A 19-year-old girl from N.C. has legally changed her name from Jennifer to CutoutDissection.com, in protest of animal dissections in schools. This article reports that she first began opposing dissections in middle school, when she was asked to dissect a chicken wing. The girl, who now goes by "Cutout" (you can't make this sh-t up), is an intern for P.E.T.A.--where great minds work tirelessly to promote great ideas. Obvi.

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